TV Guide

While doing nothing in Lubbock, I did watch some TV. Be warned that most of it is as gut-churning as Jerry making everybody hold hands at PJs during a football game and sway. Therefore, should you go back home I have prepared a guide for acceptable viewing.

*The History Channel - No surprise here, but they have added newly released footage and colorized it. My favorites were Secret Aircraft of WWII (I only saw the Japs and Germans) and The Color of War.

*The Sci-Fi Channel - Made the cut on the basis of one show only, Battlestar Galactica. This is the new one. Edward James Olmos as Adama, a drunk for Col. Tigh, a hot Cylon that talks about God, and an equally hot human/Cylon whose spine glows red when having sex. It's dark, gloomy and confusing. I still haven't found out how or why the Cylons make replicas that act the same as their human counterparts. Cinemax Asia is showing it on Sunday nights (TV schedule here) . It's on about episode 5. Don't worry about jumping in late. I saw the whole danged thing and still haven't figured it out.

*CMT - That's Country Music Television for you, Karl. While some of the videos and music are indistinguishable from Channel V crap-pop, they premiere a lot of new artists: Shooter Jennings, Waylon's son; Mando Saenz and the Del McCoury Band - not new, but new to me. Good 'ol twangy bluegrass. Their American Revolutions: Southern Rock showcases the Allmans, Skynyrd, Charlie Daniels and the Marshall Tucker Band with above-grade reporting and good video. Cowboy U is worth an episode just to see male-models and hairdressers play cowboy and get the crap kicked out of them by a steer.

Honorable Mention: VH1 - Yes, VH1. Hey, it's right between the History and Sci-Fi channels, I had to stop and take a look. And boy did I get a look. I watched the entire season of The Surreal Life 4 one night. In this show minor and washed-up celebs live together for a couple of weeks, get drunk, have sex and break down. Now, if you're questioning my taste, just think about this. About 10 minutes into Episode 1, Verne Troyer (Mini-Me), gets supremely loaded, hops on his little motorized, grocery-store vehicle and bounces around the house until he finds a corner in the exercise room and starts to pee. Oh, yeah. He's buck naked the whole time. View it here (Mini-Me's Gotta Pee) and then call me wrong in my selection. Equally delightful was watching 5 of the 6 refuse to brand a calf so they could eat steak and lobster. They got stuck with a can of pork and beans. Jane Weidlin of the Go-Go's get so distraught that she threw a fit and cried. The cowboys had a good laugh at that. VH1 has a gazillion reality shows. Watching all those celebs preen, complain, mangle language and sweat and convulse while trying to cogitate makes it very easy to pass on the rest of the channels.