Censorship in the 21st Century

Here is a New York times, complete with blacked out sections as per the White House. Here are the authors' reflections on what those deleted contained and why they should not have been omitted from the article. When will the press stand up to the administration? My guess is no time soon.

Ass Crack Bandit part 2

The Ass Crack Bandit - the origin coming soon!

Miss Bikini World

Last night D-Wayne, the Commander, Angie (for a bit) and myself watched the 2006 Miss Bikini World pageant at FuBar. I was starting out already disappointed because the contest was originally slated to be held at a Buddhist monastery in Puli, near Taichung, but was then moved to the National University Gym in Taibei. Didn't get much better. Sorta like going to the Ponderosa buffet and seeing taco fixings and then discovering they throw in cans of corn into the taco meat. Anyway, it went sorta like this.

The opening number was some sort of traditional Chinese (I guess) dance that I'd never seen before. At the end of their number, the dancers raised a sheet and dropped it to reveal a group of Tai Ke hip-hop dancers busting down the catwalk. They were led by some tallish, overweight kid who was either wearing a wig or stole Macy Gray's hair - and he was sporting a rainbow Astro's jersey. They segued from traditional gong and clanging music to a hip-hopped version of the theme from The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. How, or more importantly, why that was done I have no idea. I am now certain that I will punch the next guy who tells me that his profession is DJ.

The 40 contestants then entered wearing traditional garb, though I didn't know traditional Czech clothing came from KOA. Outside of Miss Trailer Park Europe, the only other notable was Miss Mexico who wore something on her head that resembled in size and appearance the spread tailfeathers of the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade turkey. The crowd, of which I saw no one under 60, all looked like Taiwan's ex-mainland lawmakers puzzled as to how so many barbarians could be allowed to enter the country not wearing handcuffs. All of this was accompanied by the Commander's and D-Wayne's complaining about the female Taiwanese host's English. Yeah, she did manage to make festival sound like basketball but she was much more whiney and annoying in her native tongue.

Part two is beginning as D-Wayne is finishing his handicapping of the first round. And we get...evening gowns! Everyone is disappointed, though not for the same reason. D-Wayne and myself for the obvious, the Commander because so many of the contestants didn't know that "only black" is appropriate for evening gowns. The one who truly lived up to the spirit of this pageant was either Miss Russia or Poland, who wore a sort of bikini gown. It had a small top and a little strap connecting the bottom with a slit up to the proverbial here. No one knows what Miss South Africa was wearing because we were all staring at her facial expression which I can only describe as a high sneer with a full dental (high degree of difficulty, though).

Finally, the bikinis! At this point the male host has pretty much taken over the English responsibilities and does and good job with pronunciation and phrasing - Here come contestants 21-40 and their bikinis! Miss Malta has been a steady performer and by now is number 1 on everyone's card. Miss Czech Republic amazes me and manages to make a college boy's week-old underwear look nicer than a bikini. I'm noticing a distinct lack of boobal matter among the ladies. This is especially true of Miss Taiwan who seems to be filling her cups with her shoulderblades. Ah, here comes Miss Australia paying tribute to the Aussie cattle industry. Miss South Africa scares again. Misses Malta, Spain, Venezuela, Tanzania, Russia, Poland and Hungary keep us tuned in.
The award ceremony starts with 10 awards with titles like Miss Platinum and Miss Internet, but sadly, no Miss Most Wanted. Somehow - oh yeah, we're in Taiwan- Miss Taiwan gets 4th Runner-up. It's here that my wife calls and I tell her I only need 10 more minutes to finish watching the Miss Bikini World pageant. The phone goes dead and then she immediately calls back telling me to withdraw this month's salary and give it to her now. The show continues and none of us picked the winner. Hell, Miss Malta didn't even show. Hungary got it and we got out of there (and I went straight to the ATM).

World's Most Dangerous Roads

Check it out. Also included is some crazy Chinese hiking trail. I'm sure Bread will explain how he has traveled all of these roads but feels the Chad-Sudan road should have been included due to the sheer paucity of African princesses to seduce.

I thought Soho Street would be included, but alas, the danger of chess geeks molesting you as you pass from PJ's to Fubar is not considered as perilous as bus plunges and quicksand.

Also how does this tunnel road compare to Taiwan's cross mountain tunnel roads?

Dr. Kevin de Cock

I had to look up the etymology on this name. Dr. Kevin de Cock. Of Cock. Of the Cock. I have a friend named Kevin. I had to find out. What's this Cock mean? Canadian musician Bruce Cockburn pronounces his name Co-burn. Is de Cock said like it looks? Or is there some European twist that makes it sound more sophisticated?

It's Dutch or Flemish for 'cook' and derives from the occupation.

Does that mean Bruce Cockburn comes from a family of bad cooks?

Other famous Cocks include Christina Cock, an Aussie supercentenarian and Bob Cock who isn't a true Cock but a man who took the Cock name.

Other Cocks and de Cocks.

Feed 'em some steak- The China Post reports that Kuo Wen-pin, counselor at the Office of the President, will be disciplined for a visit to what is described as a stick girls club. He expressed deep regret and is to receive one demerit for visiting the club, where orgiastic partying is said to have taken place. Buddy lawmaker, Lin Chung-mo, rushed nails to lawmakers' coffins with this defense - It's only human for men to visit such a club. Tell me who in the law chamber hasn't.

On the ball at the U.N. - Circumcision can cut the rate of HIV infection in heterosexual men by 50%, results from two African trials show. Director of the HIV/Aids department of the World Health Organization, Dr. Kevin de Cock, reported these results recently , while cautioning that the results were not a magic bullet. No study in Africa has been done among homosexual men yet, presumably because they've all moved to Taiwan.

JW's West Texas Crossroads Expose

Dusted off from the archives, the classic J-Hole movie "John Expose" or "John Exposed"...

The first part was shot at Kevlar's place in December '02...

John at the Crossroads was shot by Kevlar who knows when, maybe as early as '01...

Re-edited for your enjoyment...

Happy Winter!

'Tis the Season

Can't believe it's that time already. Where does the year go? Some of us at Ni Howdy have a bit of trouble picking the perfect gift for our respective spouses. I have come up with a great idea (I hope) for Winnie and I think the Hole might have it figured out too.
FuBar will host a Christmas Dinner on December 24th, between 5 and 6 pm. Football on the big screen and Turkey with all the trimmings. Cost is $300, with proceeds going to the orphanage. Please let me know if you will be attending, so I can prepare.

APB

What has happened to Chicago/Corona/'I aint no racist but I wish them niggers would stay on the Southside of Chicago' Don?

here's something you don't see every day

D-Wayne's Mom got this Captain Canuck under-oo set for JW. Undies worn separately.

Texas Burger Guy

is on TV. Click here for his appearance on the Food Network's show, Hungry Detective. Click title or sidebar to visit his site and take a long, drooling look at one of his recent reviews, Chris Madrid's Cheddar Cheezy Burger. Things like this make my summer vacation plans so simple.

Goth StylePART 1

"For People Who Make Up" ...

The Most Fun You've Ever Had On Your Face
BY CHAON



MORRISEY:
LISTEN TO MORRISEY

Secrets
of Style


26 TIPS FROM OUR EXPERT


DEC EDITION



12 GREAT METRO LOOKS FOR YOU



PLUS: Everything You Want to Know About
White "Chili" with Chicken and Beans!

Charlie Taylor sings Rich People's Daughters, one his catchier songs, you'll be singing along by the end...

definitely NSFW.

Charlie Taylor Live in Taichung Tonight

Charlie Taylor (blog) is performing tonight at the Grooveyard at 9pm or therearound...

If you go see him you may see something like "The Islamic Fundamentalist Blues", posted on this blog last March...

...or you may see something like "Women Are Just Like People"... newly uploaded.

Listen to some of his songs at his My Space site, like "Never Been Too Drunk to Drink" and "Eternal Hangover in Hell" to get you in the mood...

Come get drunk on a Wednesday!

My antibiotics are almost gone anyway!

Ads are getting better these days!

Stumbled upon this ad while reading the other blog. I guess anyone would be a fool to believe this actually made it on the air. But it's worth a view.

The numbers are out.

800 nt is fine.

Martin Scorcese's Sesame Streets starring Robert Deniro as the voice of Big Bird - trailer.

Mira Sorvino

Mira Sorvino majored in East Asian studies and speaks fluent Mandarin...

Anyone see if she used it in that movie she made with Chou En-Lai, er. Chou Yun-Fat?

Dinner and balloons

Billed as a 10 oz Austrailian beef steak, for 600 nt. The steak was no great wonder, thin, over cooked, no potato, no onions, just some oily sauce which I asked to be on the side. Apparently the chef thought the meat looked bare with out the sauce and broccoli. Ok whatever it says "Matino Steak house". They offered to take it back and spit on it, so I frowned and took it the way it was. Salad, nice soup, steak (eh!), Some nice cheese and crackers, ice cream. Then the chef came out and did this fried banana wrapped in a crepe type thing with a sweet kinda corn syrup... i never had fried banana. It ain't bad.
The second card is a balloon shop. They sell all manner of helium balloons and stock those flashing light toys you see at every lantern festival, evening concert, full moon thingy. A balloon is about 100 nt and they will refill it after the first week for 20 nt. My little girl thinks flying balloons should be in ever room.

I survived the visit of '06!

After 3 years, my mom and sister-in-law came to Taiwan for a visit. My dad didn't come cuz he is a fraidy cat and won't fly. Was a good visit, we did the usual things, trips to Lugang and San Yi and Yingge. Main purpose was to introduce the boy to his grandma. She was, of course, blown away by his intellect and athletic prowess (hey, he is MY boy). Big thanks to AJ and Sian for some very nice gifts. Nice touch to their visit. And big thanks to The Commander and Smart Angie and Cute Colleen for taking care of FuBar for me while I took some time off to be with my family. Bad news for them and y'all is that mediocre service is back. Sunday was a great day that we saw Taiwan win gold medals at the Asian Games.
For those that this is the high point of the week, here is a HOWIGATI.

The New Taichung comic

This is the new comic that I am creating that was inspired by Dwayne!

You know you live in Taiwan when...

You are watching NFL Monday Night Football on Friday Night (due to time zones and then Asian Games coverage)

AND

You have watched the first half of the game where it is now tied 7-7, yet ESPN Taiwan has not seen fit to show you any of the two scores or scoring drives. CHECK: 2nd Half had 2 minutes left - 3 scores without showing the scoring play!

UNBELIEVABLE.

Now, I can make some predictions based on this:

a. Some punter is going to break a record, and they want to document it?

b. Amazing 2nd Half

c. Overtime.

We'll see. By the way, it feels so liberating to root against the Eagles knowing that your Eagle fan friends have long since abandoned them this season.



NOTE TO SELF: Fubar would not have these problems. Next time wear a condom and avoid the whole baby/toddler/child never get out syndrome. Condolences Rye.

Reality is better than fiction

While taking a break from my studies, I discovered the Apollo Thirteen Mission Summary on YouTube via Ryan's link over at the I love Kevlar but I'm not gay blog. The movie pales in comparison. Part Two is better than Part One, and Part Three is a general wrapup. All are worth the time.
Happy Birthday Ryan, and tell your mother the same...

Happy birthday Rye

One cold December night back in '72. Old Frosty was hollowing up a storm. The windows were creaking, the wind was whistling. With a trusty pull of the snowmobile cord. Dig Dug was on route to the Woodstock facility. Hunger jumped in, with a quick pit pause for pickled eggs and tea they were on their way. Over drifts and frozen lakes they flew. Bound, the wee one wanted out.
Pitter, Patter, bing bang boom the ski-doo stalled! Out of Petrol, with out skipping a beat. Diggy called on the flask... with roaring engines and flashing lights they arrived. Doctor Dude readied his mit. One out, one strike on the bottom, and safe at first....

And now you know the rest of the story..


Come on What do you think Ry means? Of course that is how he got his name.

He wasn't named after Orion, He wasn't named after Rye bread, Rye only referred to Gypsy from 1850-55. Back in '72 he was named for the whiskey.


HAPPY BIRTHDAY RYE : )

Daddy Got Gout

We had a nice play date for Ivo, Shannon, and Fiona on Sunday. It went pretty much as you would expect: initial shyness, followed by pushing, crying, and the non-sharing of toys.

The highlight was a spectacular head butt laid on Ivo by Fiona. I've been making inquiries to see if Karl and Jerry would train Fiona for a future in the UFC, but I am not sure the UFC allows women to fight. Ivo by the way has a remarkable arm and can throw balls with both accuracy and strength. Keep this in mind for your Fantasy Baseball 2025 picks. Shannon was simply an annoying child - no fussing or fighting, and with amazing verbal skills. Tom, stop making Ryan and me look bad.

While watching the wee 'uns learn how to socialize (or not,) Tom from Changhua and I discussed our gout situations. We both haven't had an attack for years and he knocked on wood when saying that. Note, that I did NOT knock on wood...so of course I got the gout one day later. It was a pretty painful attack but subsided in only a day with help from pharmacopoeia.

p.s. and Rye had a good answer when I offered him a non-alcoholic beer:

"Do I look gay?"

Related Tom joke: What's the hardest part about learning to roller blade?


Telling your father you're gay.

re: kevlar's pig fetish, pig transportation in cambodia - video

And now, I have an announcement

Having done away with the NFC East (save the Cowboys, who whomped 'em in Vince's first game) and the Colts, I am on the bandwagon. So long as VY and Jeff Fischer (the coach they had when they left Houston) are running the show, count me in. GO TITANS!

Only in Montana

So there I was on Sunday, taking a lunch break at Taco Bell, minding my own business. Suddenly, this tall, two fingered fat guy with a flattop walks in, orders a couple of burritos and sits next to me. I immediatly recognize him as our new U.S. Senator, John Tester. We talked about the Griz game the day before (a victory over Southern Illinois, sorry Petra) and shot the breeze about organic farming (of which he is a practicioner). He plays the trumpet so we discussed some of the finer trumpet music out there, from Miles Davis' Sketches of Spain to Mahler's Symphony Number Five. Though in agreement there, he didn't have the same appreciation of the Berlioz Requiem as I do.

You gotta dig a state where you can shoot the breeze with your U.S. Senator without a host of other folk around. He's given us all hope that he won't be done in by the system or the party (he accepted no money from the federal DNC), but I give him one year tops. Then he'll be into it up to his armpits like his predecessor, Conrad Burns and his fellow Democrat, Max Baucus.

James K Polk Video

thanks to Hannibal Jim and his pack of pachyderms for the tip on this one in the comment box... link here

Rethinking the transportation of animals

Hey PEople send me some money and I will tell these farmers to stop.

Attention Professor Dr. Bread

Just finished watching Penn and Tellers' Showtime series, Bullshit! covering PETA hypocrisy, recycling half-truths and environmental hysteria. The show on environmental hysteria raised some questions for me and seeing as we have a gen-u-ine in-house environmental lawyer-to-be, Bread, I figured he could help me out. So, Bread, put down the seabreeze and put on your tinfoil attorney thinking cap and give me counsel.

1. First and foremost, do you know Daryl Hannah?
2. If I can't use wood when making a tree house, what should I use? Would hemp hold up?
3. If I did use wood to make my tree house, could you get Daryl Hannah to come over and sit in it?
4. Considering Woody Harrelson's lunatic beliefs, don't you think he has an ironic name?
5. Since Florida's gonna be gone in 50 years could you help me acquire some future beachfront property in southern Georgia?
6. I hate my workplace environment. I feel threatened. More than one 7th grader has made fun of my hair ( something I know you can relate to ) and accused me of wearing a rug. Can I sue them? Remember that this is a private school and their parents are loaded. Can we sue them.

Thanks in advance for your reply and I look forward to buying a second-hand AMC Pacer with our windfall.

A History Lesson

In 1846 Democratic president James K. Polk ordered American troops into the hotly contested border area between the Rio Grande and the Nueces rivers following some hostilities in the area. In doing so he asked Congress not to declare war, but to admit a state of war with Mexico already existed. Charging that shots had been fired on American soil, he rallied the patriotic fervor of the nation, which saw over 300,000 men enlist to fight the Mexicans (50,000 would be sent to modern day Texas in order to defeat the Mexicans).

A freshman representative would challenge Polk to prove the first shot had indeed been fired by Mexicans on American soil (a hotly contested issue at the time). President Polk ignored him. The local newspapers would compare him to Benedict Arnold for going against the obvious right of the United States of America to defend herself. The young representative claimed that to 'accept Polk's position without question was 'to allow the President to invade a neighboring nation...whenever he may choose to say he deems it necessary.' The Whig party (later to reorganize as the Republican party) he represented voted on a measure which called the war 'unecessarily and unconstitutionaly' initiated by the president.

Today, President Polk is considered a top ten president for his annexation of Texas (prior to the war) and his stern negotiations in victory, receiving reparations which would incude all of modern-day California, Nevada, Utah, most of Arizona, New Mexico, and Colorado, and a small portion of Wyoming (the Mexican Cession). The young representative is viewed by most as the Nation's greatest president, Abraham Lincoln.

It takes about 10 seconds to leave a comment

English John, are you there? Drop us a comment and let us know your whereabouts.

The same for Hannibal Jim.

D.U.G.?

Gentleman Chris? Still there?

Hey, Thailand! Do we know you? Surely you can't just be a casual reader. Say hi to the boys.

Flags at Half Mast

I was amazed, shocked and, well I wont lie , filled with tears when I witnessed the flags across America were at half mast in honour of not many soldiers , but one mere soldier, one who has touched the nation beyond the realm of possibility .. A saddened nation doesnt mourn , but celebrates its dear fallen soldier ....

Donovan Mcnabb may lye idle on his couch and watch his Eagles fall for the season , but as legions and legions of fans around the nation hold him true in thier hearts , do the Eagles really lose???

Quoi? Quebec declared a "nation"

Quebec is going to be recognized as a nation within Canada. (Title link).

Where is Harper's strategy?

1980 referendum 1995 referendum 2001 push for the "Quebec Nation".
Is this some kind of "Get cake and eat it to plan?"
One minister resigns. The rest sign up. Bend over, and get on board.

Quebec gets a seat in the UN? Taiwan politicians flock to study French to get Quebec's support for joining th UN.

Quebec had plenty of prime ministers, is there more influence,power to be had. Ok, so a prime minister has to duke it out with political parties. The Bloc is growing in strength. Soothe old wounds and start a new. A progressive conservative idea ( "Quebec Nation "The Bloc's idea). All parties are lining up to support.

My ramblings are getting off track here.

How does recognizing Quebec as a nation within Canada benefit the other provinces?

Is granting the "Quebec Nation" status, like giving a huge lollipop to crying baby?

The Fighting Prairie Y'all

After reading Larry Thornberry's article, Cowboys and Turkeys, part of which talks about Tony Hillerman discussing the Indian / Native American moniker melee with...Indians / Native Americans, I was left pondering the obvious - When will Indianapolis, Indiana be renamed Native Americanapolis, Native Americana? and Why is the University of Indiana still allowed to compete in postseason play?

IU may be getting a pass, but Wikipedia lists 40 some-odd schools who were coerced or just decided to change their names from anything Indian related. Sometimes the change required only a space - Blackhawks to Black Hawks - or the change of one word - Redskins to RedHawks. Hawk was a popular fallback, showing up 11 times. But then, then, I saw Nebraska Wesleyan Plainsmen changed their name to the Prairie Wolves. What? Why?

Administrators at the university, formerly called the Plainsmen, thought the new name was more sensitive in regards to both gender and ethnicity.

Admittedly, it is more sensitive and inclusive, representing both sexes of wolves and I don't think that wolves have different ethnic groups, but what about species sensitivity? Shouldn't humans be upset for being deemed not good enough to act as a mascot? Don't think that the Lupine-American bloc won't be up in arms, howling about perpetuating the stereotype of wolves as big-fanged, aggressive, drooling sex fiends, either.

The solution to this (and everything else, just ask them) lies with the Chinese. When choosing the 2008 Olympic mascot and pondering "Human or animal? Human or animal?" they came up with the only truly egalitarian choice - both. (The) five little children...also embody the natural characteristics of four of China's most popular animals and the Olympic Flame (don't want to offend the elements). Sorta like a cuddly X-Kids.

Is this the Wang picture?

Between the stripes at the bottom of the picture it says "GQ Taiwan". Why would a baseball uniform be considered fashionable. Perhaps Big Gay Lance and Bread bought a lot of stock in mens fashion magazines. If that is true, you can expect to see some colorful hawaii jump suits on the runway soon.

NB Blogger Acquitted

follow-up here

Two Who Get It and One Who's Getting All Of It

From ESPN's LZ Granderson's interview with J.J. Redick - From pre-season penthouse to regular season outhouse - courtesy of a back injury - Redick talks about his exit from the spotlight.

The thing I think people sometimes misunderstand about athletes or actors
or singers is that because we're famous they think we're special," he says. "But
we're really not. We're just people trying to do the best we can, just like
them.

From Katherine Kersten's article in the StarTribune - The University of North Dakota has been granted an injunction so that they can continue to participate in, and host athletic events while using their mascot, the Fighting Sioux. Before you read the complete article, make a bet with yourself as to who the truly indignant are. Read Joe White Mountain's quote (Standing Rock Tribal Council committee member) for a hint.

"I asked them, 'What tribe do you belong to?' " he says. "Not one was a Sioux
Indian."

Our buddy, PJ, continues his encirclement of Soho Street with the opening of his newest place, Soho Street Wine & Jazz Cafe ( or Soho Cafe Street according to another mag as well as his own awning). Look for encirclement to be complete in early 2008 when D-Wayne retreats back to the land of The First Smokers. While PJ has not yet decided the theme of his next place, I've heard him mention a Jersey-style kimchi place as well as a family-style jello shot bar.

A belated Thanksgiving video. Classic WKRP. Thanks to The Fat Guy.

Thanksgivin' Football

Triple Header this year. Gotta love Thanksgiving. FuBar will have the last part of the Miami Detroit game at 5 pm , and Tampa - Dallas and Denver-KC games in their entirety, beginning at 6 pm.
On another note, I see the morons in charge of Fox have decided against the OJ book and TV interview, calling the idea "ill-conceived". Well, no shit, Sherlock. Did it really take Fox affiliates refusing to air the interview and general moral outrage to make them realize that? But I can see their point of view from a purely business aspect. The book would have sold like hotcakes and all kinds of idiots in North America would have been glued to their tv screens to see how the Juice did it. Excuse me, WOULD have done it, if it had been him. Which, of course, it wasn't.
On yet another note, check out the tv show The Boondocks. The comic strip in the Taipei Times is a series. Makes me laugh.
And couldn't let the post go by without sending my condolences to Gutted and Howie. Hope you didn't hurt anyone when you chucked your tv out the balcony window. Chin up, my makakas. They didn't have the groceries this year anyway.

Thanksgiving at the Mannings

I would have to guess that Peyton threw the Dallas game just so that Eli will feel slightly better at the family gathering.

Dad will probably make Eli run some passing drills after dinner though. Who could blame him?

Baseball overseas?

An easy link to learn about it all. Wow! Cuba is good!
Click here.

IBAF-Taiwan

In an attempt to get out readership up 200% I have entitled this the IBAF. I hope it works. Sorry readers if you have been mislead.

I attended the final game, saw some friends and ate my final Oldies Frank for the month. It wasn't a bad game, but the excitement came in the 11th and 12th innings. In the 11th, the Cubans hit a solo homerun. The photo with the blue hats shows the Cuban team clearing the bench to congratulate the batter. However, this celebration was a little bit like Lance in bed (not that I know, but I've heard rumours) premature. The Helan team sucked back a few bowls, re-focused their attention on the ball and tied the game.

Unfortunately, they may have smoked a few too many. The Cubans roared back with their blunted bats and rallied to get the bases loaded. Like one quick hit of the bong, a liner triple was drilled to the right field corner clearing the bases and ashing out the Nederlands team. The roach was savoured as was the moment and victory.

At 4:20 the following day, the Cuban team was set to depart from Taiwan's newly named airport. Although many of the team members were elsewhere, some could be seen selling their ball caps, jerseys and belts for small amounts of cash to the airport staff and some fans. The news reported you could get you a jersey with the authentic smell of Cuba for about $2000nt.

Where was JW?

Some more of my favorite photos

Baseball

A wonderful week of baseball! A look at the other games which haven't been posted.

A bit out of order but to the top left, you Chang Tai Shan is up to bat. Not much luck in this game. But a wonderful game it was. Sunday afternoon, TPE vs. KOR with the Chinese team down four runs, a grand slam is cracked out of the park. This game would end in the 12th with a two run shot by TPE.

The evening before saw JPN and TPE play. A bit of a heartbreak loss for the TPE team as a two run shot was hit in the bottom of the 8th by JPN to take the win.

Tuesday afternoon saw the oversized Cubans match up against Japan. This would be my third game. The cubans are big.

Finally the game of the year for Taichungers as Wang Jian Ming would toss out the first pitch. Unfortunately this was the only good photo I was able to get. There was a lot of stir and his pitch happened faster than the blink of an eye. He came out, tossed and went back in with a hat tip to the crowd. But the game made up for that. An exciting game played by both sides. In this game I actually saw a stolen base, a balk, shaky double plays and a two run shot by Chang Tai Shan to win the game. In the forth inning a foul ball was hit in our direction and bounced off my seat. Unfortunately, I had an urge for an Oldies Frank. Peaky got the ball and Justin was on ESPN.

Stay tuned as the Cubans will face Chinese Taipei tonight in round 1 of the playoffs. More photos to come.

Commies Invade Muleshoe

Bread's informative post about Africa and Chinese involvement led me to do a little looking around and see how safe we were from the Red Chinese threat within our own borders. Not content with sucking up Africa's oil they now have their eyes on 1 billion pounds of Texas cow turd. This will be used to produce ethanol that mixed with gasoline will replace the equivalent of 2.4 million barrels of imported oil a year. Now, the company describes itself as "Dallas-based," but even a cursory examination of their web site reveals the truth. First, the name - Panda Ethanol. For Pete's sake! You can't even shoot a panda anywhere near the US. No "Dallas-based" company would ever think of using the word panda for the name of a company. They would use something more like Mesquite-Fired Ethanol or HANDGUN! Ethanol. Secondly, and as equally telling, their CEO graduated from UT in Austin! Why not just hoist up the red flag now? People of Muleshoe, do not stand idly by. Before you know it the world's largest muleshoe will be torn down and replaced by a civet vat and you'll be standing in line to eat 10,000 Year Old Cow Patties. Recall Lee Horsley now.

下　一　項

Let's remember to support the real democrats tonight as they take on the Caribbean commies tonight at the new ballpark. Here's my photo of the guy who will be leading the first wave.

Cold Marinated Bean Sprouts

This recipe is for the Commander, who professed a love for bean sprouts over a beer factory brew. I've made it several times and find it quite tasty, while it also satisfies my wife's urging to eat more veggies. The recipe is Ken Hom's, from his book Illustrated Chinese Cookery. An extremely good book that has sections covering its history, ingredients, equipment, techniques, menus as well as the requisite recipes, it sets the benchmark for Chinese cookbooks. He's the Smoky of Chinese cooking. Order it online or go to Cave's where I got mine several years ago.

Serves 4

450g (1 lb) fresh bean sprouts

2 fresh red or green chiles

3 tablespoons Chinese white rice vinegar or cider vinegar

2 tablespoons light soy sauce

2 tablespoons finely chopped fresh coriander (cilantro)

2 teaspoons finely chopped garlic

Trim and discard both ends of the bean sprout and put trimmed sprouts in a glass bowl ( he trims the sprouts for the sake of appearance - I prefer not to). Split chiles in half, remove seeds (if you're a girly man) and finely shred. Add it and other ingredients to the bean sprouts and mix well. Let it marinate for at least 2 to 3 hours, mixing it from time to time. When ready to serve, drain the bean sprouts and discard the marinade. He recommends using it as an appetizer or as a salad course with grilled meat or fish.

Looking Back on the Oracle of Montana

A year ago I wrote of a pending regional war in Africa. Clearly Darfur has spilled over into Chad, no big surprise. The real surprise is how quickly it seems to have affected the Central African Republic.

It looks like the Americans have given up on supporting the Khartoum government, at least superficially (as I predicted wouldn't happen). I'm not sure if that's good or bad for regional stability, but I find it intresting to note Ethiopian involvement in Somalia and the ramifications on Eritrean 'interests.' Long story short, the newfound friendship between Eritrea and the Sudan can mean nothing but trouble for Ethiopia, especially with an Islamicist regime installing itself in neighboring Somalia despite an Ethiopian military presence within Somalia's borders. This region is going to blow, and blow soon. What's left afterwards will be trouble for Europe, North America, and possibly East Asia.

The wild card will be Chinese pragmatism in regards to foreign policy. The Chinese have invested heavily within the Sudan in hopes of gaining access to the southern oil fields; regime change as the Americans want will not be acceptable. However, if the situation worsens (or when the situation worsens), nobody knows how strongly China is willing push to protect her own interests.

As a sidenote, I discount the Middle East getting too heavily involved, other than through jihadists. The governments will watch from the side (with the occasional inflamatory news report) and let Khartoum and Mogadishu sort things out.

Could this be the opportunity for Khadafi to insert himself into the African leadership role he has coveted? It's a scary world when we must turn our eyes to Khadafi for peace and hope.

P.S. Canadians be warned: Your beloved peacekeepers will be in the region to clean up the mess in ten years. Of course, it looks as if peacekeepers may already be heading there to join the African Union troops. Pragmatism by Khartoum?

SUNDAY! SUNDAY! SUNDAY!

#2 vs. #1

Sunday will be a big day at FuBar. Texas Hold'em Tournament for charity- show up at 2 pm for a day of bettin' and bluffin'. Michigan-Ohio State College football game starts at 3 pm. Likely decide National Championship. And slid in there somewheres will be live baseball from the new stadium. Bronze medal game at 1pm, not that i get here before 2. And gold medal game at 6:30. Cheer on Taiwan to the championship.
HOWIGATI

Fashion Hex Relief

Good idea, wrong focus. Sadly enough, Korea's fashion police will soon be disbanded. What will become of these selfless but misguided and soon-to-be-unemployed civic heroes? Without a cogent plan for their dispersal, rogue countries and organizations will simply buy their talent and hold nations hostage with threats of mandatory corduroy and polyester leisure suits for all and a Casual Pink Jumpsuit Friday. Under the correct guidance, these men and women can stop forever the retina-damaging excesses of Rip Taylor, Boy George and Bread. I support Vermont's newly elected socialist senator, Bernie Sanders, call for the formation of the Hugh Beaumont Rapid Deployment Brigade. Armed with Flowbees and neckties they will be on 24 hour standby and can reach any point in the continental US as fast as their Greyhound Discovery Pass will allow. Do you really want this to be out on your street?

下 一 項

Time for a ing

Really. Why buy any other paper? Exact wording and punctuation courtesy of Taiwan's Leading English-Language Newspaper since 1952

Don't relieve one's nature in the sea

Don't relieve your nature in the sea. Tsai Wen-hsing was arrested for defecating into the sea from aboard the Chuanlienhsing off the Pescadores. Article 18 of the Maritime Pollution Act stipulates anybody found to have " released waste into the sea" may be fined between NT$200,000 and NT$1million." Of course, the stool is waste.

But it doesn't pollute the sea. In fact, fish may like it. They feed on it. Coastguardsmen on their cutter sighted Tsai, but his ship was chugging farther away. They boarded the Chuanlienhsing and required Tsai to enact his crime, because pictures they took when they sighted him were all blurred to be of use as incriminating evidence. The poor Chinese was compelled to obey.

下 一 項

Foreigners cause of slump in local Indonesian hex market.

When I think of disasters that Satan could bring, I don't think I've ever considered bloating like broccoli to be one of them.

Every Vote Counts

In a crazy race which will determine the fate of Montana's lower house, the candidates have forged a tie. Laurel, just north of Billings, is a union town. The Billings area is a bit more red. And so it goes, a perfect split ahead of a recount. The only reason I mention this story is because a classmate of mine has a vested interest in the race, her father is Kayson Kerns, the Republican who would lose if the Governor gets to appoint. She is calling all the friends she has ever known to ensure they voted and chewing them out if they didn't.

round robin complete

with taipei's shocking victory over cuba last night, 4-3, and australia's loss to the

netherlands, the top 4 teams are: cuba and japan both at 6-1, netherlands at 5-2, and

taipei at 4-3. this earns the hosts the right to play cuba again on saturday night

in the

semis. japan will play the netherlands at 1pm... these games will be at the new

stadium.

losers' round will be played at the old one...

here's a link to the final round robin standings...

The baseball/ a post

The phone on the left can't handle a grounder from a one year old. The phone on the right takes a lickin' and keeps on getting weird Chinese messages. The messages are on the spicy side. I attempted to contact the sender... looks like there is a bit of a mix up. I would get the black phone fixed, but unfortunately for me it works fine whenever I am in a phone shop.
Cuba will play this weekend and I will make an effort to see them play. Ry can watch 26 innings a day. I will have to step up and paint my face for the Cuba game. I wonder if any of the nine bloggers on this blog will make it out to a game? Rye needs some support, he is getting tired of cursing at umpires by himself.

taichung baseball updates

australia vs. cuba tonight at 6:30. bring your own beer. red a, you coming?

last night the aussies blew a 7-1 lead to the koreans who notched it a 8 in the late innings. they held on to win 10-9 in the end... entertaining game...

cuba beat japan 6-3...

chinese-taipei lost 4-2 in 10 to the netherlands last night... they play the philippines today, cuba tomorrow... so they'll probably end the round robin 3-4... assuming they beat the filipinos and lose to the cubans...

playoffs start saturday...

sunday extras

i hit both games at the new stadium yesterday

game 1 was the taiwan - korea game ... taiwan overcame a 6-2 deficit in the 7th with 5
runs via a solo shot and then a grand slam to go up 7-6... they blew it in the 9th when the korean leadoff man tripled and eventually scored to send it into extras... they went to the 12th when -i dont know these guys' names, sorry- with one on taiwan hit yet another homer to make it 9-7...all taiwan's runs came on the long ball... the korean manager was ejected in the 12th after the go ahead homer, during which they played the replay of the homer over and over and over... they place was nuts and everyone went home happy as the taiwan boys held on this time to win it... a very memorable game... thanks again to john and petra for getting there early enough to get tickets!

i met up with kevlar and dean-o for the australia-italy match up later... the aussies blew a 5-0 lead to go down 7-5 in the bottom of the 9th only to rally for 2 runs to tie it 7-7... extras again...to the same score as the earlier game...kevlar had to go out for smokes...we went to the 13th when the aussie shortstop hit his second solo shot of the game to win it 8-7...dean-o was happy to go home and kevlar was happy to have a full pack of smokes... we ate peanuts and drank beer...no concessions were open whatsoever... fun game!

today's the off day with everyone having played 4 games...

japan and cuba are undefeated but face off tomorrow at 1 pm at the new field...

i gotta work but if you've got time you should check it out...

i'll go to the australia-korea game tomorrow at 6:30 and the australia-cuba game on wed.

taiwan, australia and the netherlands are all 2-2... korea & italy 1-3 and the philippines are winless...

everyone's got 3 games left til the semis on saturday...

cuba has outscored opponents 44-3, japan 13-7...

taiwan's been outscored 26-19...

the philippines 68-2... poor bastards...

the next 3 games see taiwan playing the netherlands, philippines and cuba...

see yall at the ballpark!

cubans wax italians

we spent a beautiful afternoon at the new ballpark yesterday...

the cubans handed it to the italians 9-0... italy got 2 of their 3 hits in the first inning, and they were infield ones to boot...the cubans pounded out 16...

Ivo ran around to all corners of the ballpark and had a fantastic time...

J-hole wore his camouflage in order to better blend in, after all there were 'commies' everywhere...

Pey-tra wore gingham and a bonnet, carted in a mess of noodles and I reckon left the keys to the chuckwagon with Cookie who was a-stirrin' the chili...

Dean-o fed the lion, the Singha Lion, and cursed out everyone, including the italian 2nd baseman who was reduced to tears in the 5th beneath an unrelenting verbal onslaught...

Nothing like a day at the ballpark...

the evening game saw the koreans take a 1-0 lead over japan into the bottom of the 9th only to blow it, losing 2-1... the korean ss booted an easy grounder from the lead off hitter to start things rolling...

the stadium remained ghostly empty... and the opening ceremonies last week had quotes like "...baseball is taiwan's national sport..." and "taichung is proud to host such an event..." yeah, well, other than games played by the home squad, the people of taichung have yet to step up and show any support or interest whatsoever...

today at 1:00 expect a large crowd for the taiwan - korea game...

tonight at 6:30 italy - australia! me and the j-hole are going up there on the chuckwagon with a keg and a still if anyone would like to join us...

italians smoke hosts

watching the italy-taiwan game last night on tv I noticed that the new stadium was nowhere near capacity. empty seats abounded. as the italian batting practice session wound down, it became emptier and emptier...

i've been planning to try my luck at getting tickets for the japan-taiwan game tonight at 6:30. anyone interested? kevlar? j-hole?

tickets go on sale at 4:30. i can't get there until 5:30.

if you haven't been out to the site, be forewarned that there doesn't seem to be any beer vendors within a reasonable distance of the stadium... BYOB...

i got to see the inside on wednesday...there are concession stands but they didn't appear to be operational yet...and i can't see them selling anything other than taiwan beer...

let's hope the home squad does a little better tonight. you gotta wonder since they got pecker slapped by the italians, how are they gonna fare against mighty japan?

oh and the cuba-italy game on saturday afternoon should be a good one too. i'll be carting the family up there for that one. see yall there... japan vs. korea tomorrow night too....

This day...

Glory Be, Hallejueah! Finally, that dumbass of a secretary of defense finally took the fall for an inept government. After the Republicans got their butts handed to them by the American people, somebody is paying the price. Let's hope they fix the mess.
The Giants are rocking, bring on Da Bears. Nice to see a good team on top of the NFC East and equally nice to see the Eagles and the stinkin' Cowboys trailing. (sorry, usahole, but i do love my New York Football Giants. all is good. If i ever get to Lubbock, god help me, I will stop in and have a beer.)
Frenchie and Pimp Daddy, sorry to tell you, but the Eagles just ain't that good. I know you will defend them to the bitter end, but they SUCK!! And i must say, i feel really bad about that, really i do. No, really, it's true. I wish they could have at least put up a fight for the division title.
The Hole is finally over the bitter loss to the usurpers from U of Texas, well, sorta. He still blames the officials. That's ok. When you lose, you bitch.
For anyone interested, there may be a group heading out to the new stadium to see Cooba play Italy on Saturday afternoon, get to the ball park around noon. It's at Chung De a few minutes past Sung Ju. Just drive down Chung De. You will see it on your left.
Here's a HOWIGATI. And luckily, it's not a pic of J-Hole. Don't think I can take another one of those.

Don't Quit Your Day Job

Donovan McNabb has just launched his own line of clothing.

"I've always wanted clothing that was casual and comfortable, but had a more refined look and feel," McNabb said.

Good to know that he could work that into his bye week.

"This is very near and dear to me," McNabb said. "I took a lot of pride in the design, the comfort level and the look."

While models strutted down a makeshift runway inside the RBK Concept Store on South Street, McNabb described the clothes they wore with intimate detail. He seemed to know as much about materials and textures as he does cover-2 defenses.

But don't worry Eagle's fans, he didn't lose the last three games straight because he was working on design ideas during practice instead of getting the playbook down:

"Every game, there were opportunities to make plays as a team and I ask myself, `What could I have done better?"' McNabb said. "For example, should I have used fleece instead of knit for the inner linings of my vests, or did the lines on the hoodie push the urban look too far?"

The line of clothing is called "Super 5" apparently for the number of times McNabb has built up the hopes of Philly fans only to dash them to pieces later.





I assume PJ and the Pimp have already pre-ordered their shipments.

USA Election Predictions

1. Whoever wins, I will drink a beer.

2. Whoever wins, I will drink multiple beers.

3. You know, as long as there is beer, who really cares?

4. Besides, there are always new videos to check out. WARNING N.S.F.W.

WEEK 9

What an excellent week to be an Eagles fan!!!!!!!!!! They are on a bye week and CANT lose!!!!!!!!!!!

Roman on TV

Roman the mask maker was on "Travel and Living" Ch.21. They were doing a show on Taichung artists. He did a really good job. It looked like he has a store, perhaps it is his studio. They also had the graffitti guy who sticks Hendrix and Einstien everywhere, he is an Asian named Brent from England. I had some tech problem so I didn't get the video. Maybe i will check the channel again sometime...

Out take from the Texas showdown II

"Did you ever notice...?

Out take from the Texas showdown

"...are you beaming that in my eye?"

1000th Post

Fiona Sighting

I met Fiona last weekend for the first time since she was maybe 3 months old.

What a charming little girl! And tall! Man, she's tall!

MAJOR STUDY CONCLUDES

'50 years left for sea fish' . kevlar headed for buffet.

New Brunswick Blogger Trial

Welfare blogger who is on a first name basis with the Premier charged with obstruction of justice; claims journalist rights.

His blog.

The story :"I'm a blogger! I'm an internet blogger!"

The arrest.

Check out the first installment of KTV. KEVLAR TELEVISION. This week Kevlar answers the question where does Halloween come from?