Thursday, April 27, 2006

Archeology Report from the year AD 2500

On the eating habits of South Pacific Landmass humans circa 2006. Data recovered from document entitled "Australian / New Zealand Standard - Office Desks"
Table K
Performance Requirements for Surface Resistance of Desk Top

Food stuffs including:

Canned beetroot juice, coffee*, tea**, tomato sauce, homogenized full cream milk, olive oil, beer, water, black-currant juice and carbonated coloured cola drink (non-diet)

Mustard (prepared English)

* Solution 40 gm instant coffee to 1 L of boiling water
**10 gm tea leaves to 1 L boiling water, brew 5 min., strain and use.
Analysis:

Apparently the population mainly subsisted liquids and/or semi-liquids. Our assumption is that the inhabitants were lacking in teeth.

Most popular drink was Canned Beetroot Juice.

Drinking of alcohol such as beer was accepted practice at an office desk job.

In previous research from the Canamerica Landmass, Mustard, a spicy paste used to cleanse the palate, was previously thought to be made exclusively from the dead bodies of French or Germans. Now, we see it can also be "prepared English." We speculate that using English corpses would create an inferior though cheaper Mustard suitable for office drones on the South Pacific Landmass.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's refreshing to see good solid research being carried out in this field.

Kevlar said...

When asked about BEETROOT juice my Aussie co-worker (filled with cheer) Explained that coke a cola is not sold in Australia. The pops and peeps hope to have this product available to put in their BEETROOT juice by the end of 2007. Aussies also expressed interest in trying Rum, ice, and coke in a glass. God Bless 'em.