Hola Carrefour

Firstly, I think that I should be thanked for not posting about this morning's visit to my hematologist which quickly revealed my versatile doctor to be every bit as eager as Jack Elam to deploy his middle digit in The Cannonball Run. Really. Thank me. Or you will hear about it.


This morning's clump of fliers included Carrefour's and their obvious attempt to deflate the impending opening of Costco in Taichung. Costco will open in November, though the actual date was not set when I went there. They do have an office open to view products, watch their videos and sign up for membership. If you are interested, here are the details.


Personal Membership (Gold Star Member) - $1,200NT a year. This will include two photo ID cards. But if done before the opening, they will give you a third card you can give to a friend or a family member. Split it three ways and it's $400 apiece. The next year's membership is $1,200 for the two cards and the gift card recipient will also have to pay the same if they would like to retain it. However, if you use your China Trust credit card during the year to make purchases of $90,000NT, the next year's membership fee is free. This is not limited to purchases at Costco, but anything purchased with the China Trust card. Costco accepts, cash, China Trust cards and AmEx (pretty sure it's AmEx. I just know we didn't have the correct kind of card). Nicely enough, the people helping you complete your membership are actually China Trust employees. A China Trust card is now in the mail. I just hope it's more than the $500US limit on my other one.


Business Membership - Not sure. I think they give it to you free with an X-Box. I did see a $500 figure on the sign for businesses but just figured it was that or the X-Box.

Back to the Carrefour flier. The online cover features Max Von Sydow dressed like Uncle Sam beholding a bag of Friday's Quesadilla Chips. Here, let's a look at one of the pages.


What do we have here? Chicken enchiladas, black bean enchiladas, a bean and cheese burrito and cheese quesadillas. And all made in the USA - see the red, white and blue ovals with 美國製造? It doesn't say where in the US so I guess I'll go and sample one and see if they have more info.

Bonus pic for our Canadianer friends in Taichung. Heard Special Dinners have become scarce.

Sure, she's hot, but...

Check out this Miss Teen USA contestant's response to a question about a fifth of Americans not being able to locate the US on a map. Wow! I guess she had to say something.

Now available in H K G

Krispy Kreme Doughnuts:)

Munchies..................

The Captin has left the island

Or will be shortly:)

Cheers

Bread are you okay?

Church Deacon, OU Fan Tears Scrotum Of UT Fan In Bar Fight

I hope the docs can fix you up.

For Red A

India Pale Ale

The British often get slagged on for their food, but are rarely given credit for this excellent contribution to beer drinkers around the world.

In India, during the 1700s, there was a great demand for porters & ales from British nationals. The six month voyage and large temperature fluctuations enroute, led to the arrival of flat and sour suds. Coming to the rescue was a Londoner named George Hodgson. Hodgson modified an existing recipe by increasing the alcohol content and adding hops, resulting in a delicious bitter ale that could survive the journey. Though wildly popular at the time, the style eventually fell out of favor with the Brits.

At some point in the early 1990s, the traditional British recipe for brewing IPAs was revisited by a number of Americans on the west coast and became popular again. Pictured are four of Hodgson's great great grandchildren: Deschutes Inversion IPA, on the far right, is 6.8% abv and a bit too malty. On the far left is Boulder Brewery's Mojo IPA, also 6.8% abv and quite tasty. Next to the Mojo is Avery Brewing's Maharaja, one of the finest IPAs ever made. With a 9.78% abv, this 22oz bomber packs a wicked one-two punch of alcohol and flavor. Towering over the group is the 3 litre bottle from Escondido, CA's Stone Brewing Company. Their 10th anniversary IPA is 10% abv and has an awesome combination of flavors.

One nice thing about being back, is getting to choose quality over quantity when having a beer.

Tribute Montage

Taiwan's version of the rock n' roll bad boy look as interpreted by some guy on my wife's Canada trip. He looks like a mini-Wu Bai.

P.s. anyone ever hear of Mini Kiss?

Dog owners

If you lived in this town you would have to pick up poo with your fingers. There are no bags avaliable. I have never seen "Doggy-poo bag distribution kiosks" in Taichung. I guess dog owners like J-hole just use their fingers.

Stuff

The Little League World Series continues in Williamsport, PA. In the first round of playoffs, Taiwan lost a heartbreaker to Japan in 10 innings (highlights). Big YeeHaw to the boys from Lubbock. With their win over Oregon (highlights), are on to the semis, taking on the team from Georgia. International final pits Japan against Curacao.
FuBar will show the international final Sunday at 2 pm, followed by United States final. World Series final will be shown Monday at 6 pm.

In other news, Winnie got a ticket for double parking on Tuesday night. She pulled up to drop off some recycling for the bar, and when she returned, the traffic cop? was writing her a ticket. She explained that she had only been there a minute, with hazard lights on. The cop? replied he knew that, because he saw her pull up. Anyone who's lived here has seen cars double parked overnight, if not parked on the street. Well, at least they are trying to do something about the traffic problem, eh?

Matrix

Hello readers.......I am the architect, but please call me The General. I created blogspot, and other simple blog pages and video games. I didn't create frogger but I came up with the name for it. Can you believe they wanted to call it highway crossing frog? Ergo.....Concordently....vis a vis.......

Roads....Where we're going there are no roads.....

Taken from the car while driving up north. This on the way to Barrie from Thortong. Frenchie probably knows this road. I think at the end of the rainbow you'll find Frenchie's stash.











This photo is taken in Fergus. I great shot of the sunset on the corn fields. No filter was used. It's amazing to see the difference in the clouds here. Everywhere I drive I take my camera with me now. I'm truly discovering Ontario again and it's great.

North American Union

The Security and Prosperity Partnership of North America.
Started in May of 2005.
The new currency will be called the "Amero".

Here is the link.

Red A Killed the Snapshot Function

I think I did at least. Did it work?

Great White North

Fortunately for me, my parents have a cabin up in northern Ontario. I'm able to go out and paddle on my own in the kayak and take some pics. Here is a pic of the cabin up in the hills. Of course there is a dock down on the lake were I'm able to sit and reflect on my time spent in Taiwan.















As I paddle away from the cottage, about 10 minutes down on the same shoreline you can see this unbelievable summer home. Pretty nice if you ask me, but this is considered to be a relatively small place. I have no idea who owns it, but my guess is it's a hockey player because the dock is always covered by tail.







Here is a great shot of the sunset at 9:50 pm while we are just finishing a normal meat, corn and potato dinner. Peace, quiet and tranquility. A refreshing break from the hectic pace of Taiwan.

Regrettable Google Search Results

Searching for a customer website, Grug Asia, on Google.

Hmmm, no customer - ah, I spelled the name wrong, but look at result No. 4...

White Men Asian Women Home Colorblind ? Expat in China Couples Wei ...

So you are planning that special holiday in Asia? ... the sentences can be extremely harsh (Thailand used to execute grug trafficers by machine gun - it's ...
www.whiteasian.com/Tourist%20in%20Asia.htm - 13k -Cached - Similar pages

Well I gotta click that link, right? Turns out to be a sort of semi-creepy site from late 90's. The highlights include:

a page about Dr. S. Davis, apparently the Hugh Hefner of yellow fever..

A List of asian female/white male couples from which I learned Marky Mark dated a woman named China Chow. (Hey my last name is Chow, I own a restaurant and I am part Chinese, therefore I will name my daughter China! The wife wanted Chyna, but I set her straight.)

Oh, and this fact by itself makes the website worthy:

Malaysian Prime Minister Mahathir Mohamad's daughter is married to a Frenchman.

The Dentist is Pwned!

After all of those respectable couples, let's not forget a page about sex tourism, you know, just for balance. I'm sure "Norodom Sihanouk, god king of Cambodia whose daughter is married to a white American mathematician" is happy to be associated with that page. Okay, the hotel price-list is kind of funny - I've never been to Thailand, is that normal?

Update: This website about black women with white men also has photos of couples, and includes the number of children and how long they have been married. But no page about sex tourism. That's a glaring omission.

NFL Upset

The Texans just beat Baltimore 30-3. Looks like the Texans have made major improvements in the off-season and Baltimore's vaunted defense couldn't cut it.

Oh wait, it was a baseball game! Lucky I took the entire Texas roster for my fantasy team, eh?

Ogden, the Inappropriate Yoga Guy

This guy struck me as an amalgam of at least 4 different guys I knew back in the Changhua days. Stinky Will (looks), Tennessee Jeff (approach), Naked Yoga Mikey (interests) and Scott the Dick (arrogance). Hilarious!

Check out GoPotatoTv for more stuff like this.

A Taste of Home

This first photo is taken in Georgian Bay. Out of Perry Sound you can go on a 4 hour long cruise of the 30,000 islands in Georgian Bay of Lake Huron. For those of you who don't know, it's about half the size of Taiwan and it's only consiered to be a bay. The cruise was $30 and probably the best bang for my buck all summer. Canada is a lot more expensive then I even remember last year. If you decide to come for a visit, it's a must.

This is a pic for Red A and true beard progression.

This is a refreshing shot of a water lily. My gal noticed how similar they are to a lotus. We go east to view the lotus, asians go west to view the lily.

Gentlemen, I had to post this (maybe old) but here's a great SNL GIFT IDEA for your girl. (May not be suitable for work)

I wonder how on earth this could be?

Taiwan ranks 17th on IELTS scores, behind Japan, Korea

Well, let's look at the first paragraph from Julie Pien of The China Post to see if we can find out.

下一項

Short four picture development of a spring to a stream at my cousin's (for now) Rattlesnake Springs Ranch in the Texas Hill Country.

Not the airport!

Fire on Water say wise man.
Anyways, before leaving Taiwan I had an opportunity to do the Southern Cross Island Highway. It was beautiful and a must see while you are in Taiwan. Absolutely beautiful scenery.










This is a shot from the temple on the west side of the mountain range. I love this shot because when I first came to Taiwan, this is what I thought I would be seeing. It's beautiful, like a painting and I hope to frame this photo sometime.

Below, you can see two photo's on the East side of the range. I had to shrink these photos to get them on the page. I have many more upon request.
(Notice the beard progression)

Taiwanese farmers protest US Pork

Actually, I don't really care about this story, but I found a cool website that has all the pork-related news you could want:

Welcome to ThePigSite.com - the website for the global pig and pork industry

Underwear material HINT

U S M S a m u i

Did you know?

• The longest flight from USM is 1,270 miles.
• The largest aircraft flying out of USM is a 717 with 125 seats.
• USM connects with 6 cities nonstop.
• The smallest commercial aircraft flying out of USM is a DH7 with 48 seats.

# of airlines servin this location?????????? 2

S I N C h a n g i

Did you know?

• The longest flight from SIN is 9,524 miles.
• The shortest flight out of SIN is 184 miles.
• There are over 1,160 long haul flights per week from SIN.
• There are 109 nonstop flights per week departing from SIN.

U'd think more long haul flights a week w/51 carriers servin this location a day!

D P S D e n p a s a r

Did you know?

• There are over 327 domestic flights per week from DPS.
• DPS connects with 28 cities nonstop.
• There are over 139 long haul flights per week from DPS.
• There are 58 nonstop flights out of DPS per week that have over 300 seats per aircraft

26 air carriers and none of them North American based......... ?

Caption Contest

Pant-tease

This is a pair of female _____. Can you guess what they are made from? Hints: It is not cotton, silk, or bamboo.

Late Notice

D-Wayne will be showing the Taichung Li-Shing baseball team's opening game at the Little League World Series at 1:00 today at FuBar. It's a repeat from 6:00 this morning, so no spoilers. Esquire Willy will be in attendance in case you have any rotten tomatoes or vegetables that need discarding.

Free! With Purchase of Holy Handgrenade

The Holy Handkerchief. At least that is the only translation I can find for Taiwan's Central Weather Bureau's Chinese name for Typhoon Sepat (國際命名：SEPAT，中文譯名：聖帕) which is set to strike Taiwan on Saturday.

下一項

The International Baseball Federation (IBAF) cancelled the 13th World Junior Championship yesterday in Venezuela. The IBAF responded to Taiwan's complaint that Venezuela would not issue visas for the team, and lo and behold, they cancelled the tournament and told all teams to return home. They are even, gasp, considering sanctions and punishment for Venezuela.

There you go, Red A. That's my Ghost Month story.

NFL is starting soon, but here at home...

...the PRIMETIME section of espnstar.com reads:

Massive win for Singapore's Susilo. (Action Images / Zainal Abd Halim)

Friday August 17, 2007
Singapore's Susilo downs Chinese star

Singapore's Ronald Susilo dumped third seed Chen Jin from the badminton world championships on Thursday, and immediately warned the formidable Chinese shuttlers against complacency....more

	Hidayat crashes out of worlds Indonesia's Taufik Hidayat was sensationally dumped from the world badminton championships on Wednesday by unseeded Anup Sridhar from India.
	Badminton: China launches assault The Chinese shuttlers, who dominate the world rankings, started the World Championships in commanding style.
	Badminton: Europe's Gade determined to crash Asian party Europe's number one shuttler Peter Gade vowed to slay some Asian giants at the world badminton championships, declaring himself fit and ready for the premier event starting on Monday.

Not an Airport III "SMT"

Shanghai Maglev Train (Shanghai Transrapid) (Chinese: 上海磁浮示范运营线; Pinyin: Shànghǎi Cífú Shìfàn Yùnyíng Xiàn; literally "Shanghai Magnetic Levitation Demonstration Operation Line") is the first commercial high-speed maglev line in the world. Construction began in March, 2001, and public service commenced on January 1, 2004. The train was made in Germany with German technology.

The train can reach 350 km/h (220 mph) in 2 minutes, with a maximum speed in normal operation of 431 km/h (268 mph). During a test run on 12 November 2003, the vehicle achieved a top speed of 501 km/h (311 mph). The Shanghai Transrapid project took 10 billion yuan (1.33 billion US dollars or Au$1.49 Billion) and 2.5 years to complete the 30.5 km (19 mi)

track.

The train runs from Longyang Road station in Pudong on the Shanghai subway line 2 to Pudong International Airport, and the total track length is about 30 kilometres, with an additional, separate track leading to a maintenance facility. The train takes 7 minutes and 20 seconds to complete the journey, and its top operational speed is 431 kilometers per hour.

As of November 2006, the one way ticket price is 50 renminbi (RMB) (about $6.33 US dollars) and 40 RMB (US$5.06) for airline passengers with proof of an airline ticket purchase receipt (plane boarding passes are not acceptable). One-way VIP ticket costs 100 RMB (US $12.66). A round-trip ticket costs 80 RMB (US$10.13).

• Operating times: 7:00 to 21:00
• Highest Speed: 431 km/h (268 mph) (Normal Times) or 300 km/h (186 mph) (Extend Times)
• Run time: 7 mins and 20 sec. in Normal Times, while 8 mins and 10 sec. in extend times
• Normal Times is 8:30-17:00, Extend Time is 7:00 to 8:30 and 17:00-21:00
• Interval: 15 mins.

What's next for the SMT......... Could be Shanghai to Hangzhou by 2010:)

Not an Airport IV "NWFF"

And the Macau to Zhuhai ferry............

Thanks Red "A" :)

New World First Ferry Services Limited (Traditional Chinese: 新世界第一渡輪服務有限公司) (in short New World First Ferry, First Ferry or NWFF) is a ferry company in Hong Kong. The company was established in November 1999, when it took over the 10 routes from the Hongkong and Yaumati Ferry. It is jointly owned by Chow Tai Fook Enterprises Limited and NWS Holdings Limited

N K G N a n j i n g

Did you know?

• There are over 44 international flights per week from NKG Airport.
• NKG Airport has 167 flights departing per week for short haul destinations.
• NKG Airport has 329 medium sized aircraft departing each week.
• The smallest commercial aircraft flying out of NKG Airport is a EMB with 18 seats.

17 air carriers and Unknown & OK airways top the charts again:)

D L C D a l i a n

Did you know?

• The longest flight from DLC Airport is 1,236 miles.
• Over 77,128 passengers can travel out of DLC Airport every week.
• DLC Airport has 207 flights departing per week for short haul destinations.
• DLC Airport has 251 medium sized aircraft departing each week.

21 air carriers....... BFD

N R T N a r i t a

Did you know?

• There are over 1,239 long haul flights per week from NRT.
• Over 418,626 passengers can travel out of NRT every week.
• NRT has 492 medium sized aircraft departing each week.
• The largest aircraft flying out of NRT is a 747 with 450 seats.

53 air carriers and guess what...... some how "Air Canada" made their way back into the mix

N G O N a g o y a

Did you know?

• There are over 200 long haul flights per week from NGO Airport.
• There are 105 flights per week flying on small aircraft from NGO Airport.
• NGO Airport has 423 medium sized aircraft departing each week.
• There are over 632 domestic flights per week from NGO Airport.

26 air cirriers and "Air Canada" ain't 1 of them.........

O R D O H a r e

Did you know?

• ORD has 2,504 medium sized aircraft departing each week.
• The shortest flight out of ORD is 66 miles.
• There are 4,175 flights per week flying on small aircraft from ORD.
• There are over 1,974 long haul flights per week from ORD.

With 36 air carriers hitting this locations a week........ U'd think 1 of them would b on time:(

Basics on Taiwan and the UN

Article written by Prof. Tom Plate and published today in the Japan Times. link
link in the title.

D E N D e n v e r

Did you know?

• There are over 1,196 long haul flights per week from DEN International.
• There are 150 nonstop flights per week departing from DEN International.
• There are 21 airlines operating out of DEN International.
• The shortest flight out of DEN International is 72 miles.

20 air carriers and Air Canada is still in the mix......... b proud boys!

Oh, and look there really is a J. Hole:)

S E A S e a t t l e T a c o m a

Did you know?

• There are over 1,024 long haul flights per week from SEA International.
• The smallest commercial aircraft flying out of SEA International is a 73M with 26 seats.
• There are 1,027 flights per week flying on small aircraft from SEA International.
• The longest flight from SEA International is 6,060 miles.

Woopin 23 air carriers servin this location weekly........

A N C A n c h o r a g e

Did you know?

• The longest flight from ANC International is 5,072 miles.
• There are over 25 international flights per week from ANC International.
• There are 15 nonstop flights out of ANC International per week that have over 300 seats per aircraft
• ANC International has 435 flights departing per week for short haul destinations.

18 air carriers servin this location and imagine that......."Air Canada" was 1 of them.

A Taipei Times Saturday

No, that is not Louis Gossett, Jr. That is the mummified remains of Master Kai Feng (釋開豐), founder of the Lungfatang Buddhist asylum (龍發堂) in Kaohsiung county. Seems that he just can't keep out of the news, even after passing on to one of the 6 realms in 2004.

The Buddhist facility came into the spotlight in early 2000 when 5 psychiatric patients escaped from the facility and claimed abuse from their Buddhist disciple overseers. They claimed to have been stripped, tied to their beds, wear iron chains and urinate "without any help." Not sure about that last one, but it's probably not good.

However, their claims were quickly refuted by the managing disciple Master Hsinhsien (新賢法師) and other volunteer workers. "There are so many people here, how could I beat them all?" she (Hsinhsien) said.

"Patients beat each other up, but not the disciples," said one volunteer worker.

Hsinhsien went on to point out the practical skills the patients develop such as learning to play musical instruments and turning chicken excrement into fertilizer. They also learn leadership skills with the "chains of compassion." Two patients are chained together, one in front of the other. Here, I'll let Hsinhsien explain. The more stable patient is leading the other one, who's stupid," Hsinhsien said. When patients learn control they are then given the opportunity to escort others, she added.

Their spiritual life is not neglected, either. Patients learn the Four Noble Truths, with emphasis on the first two: 1) Suffering exists 2) Suffering arises from attachment to desires. The asylum inculcates these truths by using them as "free labor" and detaching 2.5 million NT from them and their families.

That was then, this is now. Re-enter Master Kai Feng. The above photo was from this past Saturday, August 11. For the past three years, the Master has been in a special jar ( 甕, weng4, ㄨㄥˋ) without preservatives that allowed him to return, as the Taipei Times captions, Back in Black. Oh, yeah. He'll be covered in gold foil and placed at the front of the temple / asylum / work farm for people to worship.

下一項

From Johnny Neihu's Saturday column in the Taipei Times, his preview of one of the upcoming Olympic events in Beijing.

10. Paralympics: Always a moving and exciting part of Olympics season, the Paralympics will once again feature no Chinese athletes, because, as we are told, the government thinks it is in the national interest to take the "Han" out of "Handicapped."

The TONKA issue

I'll bet they used lead paint?

Built for "Boyhood"....

Where do I come up with this crap?

Not an airport II "The Star Ferry"

Company Ltd. is a passenger ferry service operator in Hong Kong, China. Its principal routes carry passengers across the Victoria Harbour, between Hong Kong Island and Kowloon.

The fleet of twelve ferries operates four routes across the harbour, carrying over 70,000 passengers a day, or 26 million a year. Even though there are now other ways to cross the harbour (by MTR and road tunnels), the Star Ferry continues to provide an efficient, popular and inexpensive mode of crossing the harbour. The company's main route runs between Central and Tsim Sha Tsui, which is what most people mean by "the Star Ferry" in common parlance.

Incredible.... I can just highlight the text and drag it over:)

Not an airport "THSR"

The Taiwan High Speed Rail (Traditional Chinese: 台灣高速鐵路, also known as the THSR) is Taiwan's high-speed rail network, running approximately 335.50 kilometers (208 mi) from Taipei City to Kaohsiung City, which began operations on January 5, 2007. Adopting Japan's Shinkansen technology for the core system, the THSR uses the Taiwan High Speed 700T train, manufactured by a consortium of Japanese companies, most notably Kawasaki Heavy Industries^[1]. The total cost of the project is currently estimated to be US$15 billion,^[2] and is the one of the largest privately funded transport schemes to date. Express trains capable of travelling at up to 300 km/h (186 mph)^[3] travel from Taipei City to Kaohsiung City in roughly 90 minutes as opposed to 4-6 hours by conventional rail^[4], although regular scheduled THSR trains take approximately two hours when incorporating all the stops.

We all knew a friend or 2 involved..........

Flyin in low and slow headin for the Four O Seventy Seven

That's right boys and girls out there in Blog Land........

5'O clock Charlie here.

Spreadin the brotherin seed all over places called "Zhou" in today's contribution.
Which by the way would have been a total of 13 contributions.
But Administrator IJ said only four "airport" contributions a day.

So 2morrows contribution will be brought 2 you covering four popular US destinations.

Could have been another one of those bi-crappy contributions coverin conversation between 2 people talkin.

He said: Bla Bla Bla

She said: Bla Bla Bla

It said: Bla Bla Bla Bla

Chinese just say "Ta".........

C A N G u a n g z h o u

Did you know?

• There are over 281 international flights per week from CAN Airport.
• The largest aircraft flying out of CAN Airport is a 777 with 380 seats.
• CAN Airport has 1,190 medium sized aircraft departing each week.
• CAN Airport has 706 flights departing per week for short haul destinations.

30 air carriers servin this location.......... mind bogglin

H G H H a n g z h o u

Did you know?

• There are 43 flights per week flying on small aircraft from HGH Airport.
• There are 18 airlines operating out of HGH Airport.
• There are 43 nonstop flights per week departing from HGH Airport.
• HGH Airport has 557 medium sized aircraft departing each week.

557 medium sized aircraft with only 19 carriers hitting this location.
And 1 of the air carriers is called "Unknown", while another 1 is called "Okay Airways"

http://www.farecompare.com/flights/Hangzhou_Airport-HGH/airport.html

one day i'll figure out the link thing..........

W N Z W e n z h o u

Did you know?

• WNZ Airport has 144 flights departing per week for short haul destinations.
• WNZ Airport connects with 25 cities nonstop.
• Over 45,880 passengers can travel out of WNZ Airport every week.
• There are over 24 long haul flights per week from WNZ Airport.

All that with only 9 air carriers servin this location......

Yea, Yea, Yea I know IJ...... U new:)

M X Z M e i x i a n

Did you know?

• The shortest flight out of MXZ is 199 miles.
• There are 7 flights per week flying on small aircraft from MXZ.
• MXZ has 7 flights departing per week for short haul destinations.
• There are 1 nonstop flights per week departing from MXZ.

14 flights in and out a week and only 1 air carrier....................

Brought to you from our proud sponsors.

I'll bet IJ knew that:)

You can't handle the truth!

Yet another U.S. Chinook helicopter "crashed" in Iraq today, killing 5 U.S. servicemen. According to the Pentagon: "There was no indication whether it was shot down, but an investigation is under way."

For those of you curious, the current tally of those responsible for U.S. deaths in Iraq is: U.S. helicopters 2000, the enemy 1700.

In an unrelated story, the entire North American press corps was awarded the Medal of Freedom, for refusing to give comfort to the enemy by reporting the historically high level of aeronautical maintenance failures.

Happy Ghost Month - 鬼月快樂

The gates of hell have officially opened so I guess those 300 Spartans are now free to come out and drink some asparagus juice and eat some instant noodles courtesy of my company.

In the comments let's hear everyone's Ghost Month tales, for example, Tom from Changhua claimed that one Ghost Month he wore a sheet and ran around snagging cases of beer from the prayer tables. He felt it was his since he is a 洋鬼子 = foreign devil. Has anybody got caught with clothes hanging out at night? Anyone get their Chinese friend to whistle past the graveyard?

(BTW, I once had an old lady call me 洋鬼子 and I was almost proud. I mean, how many old mainlander ladies wander around cursing whitey for no reason. Alas, now that the old mainlanders are going, going, gone we are left only with Ah-Do-Gao, Huanah, Angmogao and such.)

Biff Question Song

By Thomas F. Wilson (uh, that would be Biff).

Taiwan Trends

The new lame trend in Taiwan is to have your car sport a faux European license plate under your Taiwan license place. It started a few months ago with French cars only, but now I saw a Japanese car with one.

What probably started out as a smart marketing ploy to remind people that Renault is a European car ends up with 20% of new cars now having these fake plates. Like I really believe 20% of Taiwanese people driving are either diplomats or super-rich executives who can afford to ship the Matiz they drove in Italy back to Taiwan.

I'd have a photo up, but my camera died. If anyone can help out, edit the post to include one.

Of course, Crocs are now hitting Taiwan, too, so I have a double reason to be pissed.

Bonus Post:

My two-year old knows more about Windows than me. In under 20 seconds at the keyboard she activated Windows Narrator, "a text–to–speech utility for people who are blind or have low vision" that reads out your Windows in a circa 1990 robotic voice. COOL.

Lubbock Wins

(Photo: Lubbock Avalanche-Journal)

Congratulations! Lubbock Western beat Roswell Noon Optimist ,6-0, Friday in Waco to advance to the Little League World Series in Williamsport, Pennsylvania, from Aug. 17-26.

There are four pools of four teams each playing a round-robin within their pool. The top two teams from each pool advance to the semifinals. Here is the team pool, bracket and TV coverage.

WHAT? D-Wayne, how did you miss this? Brockville had a team representing Ontario and made it to the semis, but lost to B.C. Maybe if you had been paying attention, you could have enlisted our help in employing some sports mojo and turned things around. Well, nevertheless, Canada will be represented by the winner of the B.C. - Prairies game (Saturday, 3:00pm, Regina time).

Taiwan Little League Baseball

At the time of this posting, the Taiwan baseball team that was scheduled to play in the AA World Youth Championship in Venezuela is still in Taiwan, still trying to get visas from Venezuela. The visa refusal jeopardizes the teams' chances of making the tournament due to what a top Venezuelan baseball official said were political problems. As if it's not enough to make teams from Taiwan use the name Chinese Taipei in competition and play the Olympic theme, now top commies from around the world are stopping them from competing at all.

However, there is good news. The Taichung Li-Shing All-Stars won the Asia-Pacific division championship and are going to Williamsport to compete in the 2007 Little League World Series (Hopefully, Lubbock Western will join them).

Taiwan was also well represented in other divisions, well. Taiwan's Palomino League team (17-19 yrs. old) advanced to the final game against Puerto Rico, but ended up one run short, 3-2. Taiwan's Bronco League team (11-12 yrs. old) from Sijhih Elementary School in Taipei County, also advanced to the championship game, but fell 16-10.

For a good roundup of MLB, NPB, CPBL, minor and amateur league baseball with a Taiwan theme, check out Taiwan Baseball.

Little League Baseball

I've been following this for the past week and haven't wanted to say anything for fear that I'll bring the dreaded - and real - sports jinx. However, I think the current window of jinxdom has been closed.

The Lubbock Western Little League All-Stars have advanced to the finals of the Southwest Region tournament. One more game, one more victory, and they go to Williamsport and the World Series. They are a collection of 11 and 12 year-olds from the Western division of Lubbock's Little League. They face a team from Roswell, also undefeated, on August 10, 8:00pm, EST. ESPN has it listed on their TV schedule, so D-Wayne, please check and see if you can get it for me and we can all come out Saturday and cheer them on.

Myriad

There are two ways to use myriad, as a noun or an adjective. Examples: 1. There are myriad people who couldn't care less how this word is used. 2. There is a myriad of people who don't care how this word is used.

As a hockey fan, I couldn't imagine hearing "The Leafs had myriad opportunities on the power play, but failed to capitalize." "The Habs had a myriad of opportunities, but couldn't get one past Cujo" sounds much better.

So which usage is better? The noun or the adjective.

CSA

SUBJECT: Male, Canadian bar owner in Taichung.

SITUATION: Subject wearing Cannabis Smoke Army T-shirt. Fear of possible infiltration by impostor.

ACTION: Dispatch Red A to vet subject.

Red A: " Cannabis Smoke Army, huh? What's your rank?

Subject: " Admiral."

RESULT: Cannabis Smoke Army membership - CONFIRMED.

Talking With CoWorker

CW: Feel free to slow down anytime. We're not in any big hurry.

H: We're barely over the speed limit. Relax.

CW: Hey! Check it out. Isn't that a '57 Chevy?

H: Uh, actually that's a '55.

CW: How would you know the difference?

H: Well, the '57 has those famous tailfins and the '56 is more squared off.

CW: Oh great. Another car guy, just like my husband.

H: Actually, I'm not much into cars at all.

CW: Hey, he's pulling into that car show. Lets stop for a bit and check it out.

H: Sounds good. Just have to find a place to park.

CW: There's a spot right next to that Mustang.

H: Uhm...that's a '67 Cougar, not a Mustang.

CW: I thought you said you're not a car guy.

H: I'm not.

CW: Then how do you know exactly what it is?

H: I don't know. I grew up with these cars. I can tell you the make, model & year of just about every car produced between '65-'75. In fact, so can most guys my age.

CW: Every car?

H: Most anyway. Some of those 20' yachts you saw on Hawaii Five-O managed to escape my attention.

CW: Why on earth would you guys remember all of this stuff?

H: It's how we spent our youth. It was where we partied. Where we met chicks. It's etched into our memory banks & apparently only alzheimers is gonna scrub it out.

CW: So fifty years from now, when your eyes and memory are failing you, you'll still be able to tell a '67 Cougar from a Mustang.

H: Yup.

CW: I guess that's why guys thought Marissa Tomei was so hot in "My Cousin Vinny."

H: Marissa Tomei would be hot in anything. But yeah, that whole posi-traction bit definitely didn't diminish her sex appeal. What I had trouble with was her & Joe Pesci together.

CW: Maybe she had a Helen Keller moment.

H: A Helen Keller moment?

CW: Blind wouldn't cut it for Joe Pesci. You'd have to be deaf too.

H: Gotcha.

CW: So why don't you sell cars for a living?

H: I don't know anything about cars today except that they all have names like Alero and X-tera. I guess they want us envision ourselves driving on the moon or something.

CW: So why not sell vintage cars?

H: Cause I'm not a car guy. I be spotted as a fraud in two seconds.

CW: But you know so much about them. How could you be made as a fraud?

H: Because they don't get me excited like they do car guys. I have more of a matter of fact appreciation.

CW: So what gets you excited?

H: Well, Marissa Tomei for starters.

CW: Never mind. What's that thing doing here?

H: The Miata? It's in the show. They're good looking cars & fun to tool around town in.

CW: Yeah, I know, but isn't it a bit out of place with all these classics?

H: Well, it's a small car show and sometimes they bring these in to fill out the lot.

CW: But wouldn't people make fun of him.

H: No. That's the beauty of car shows. Car guys appreciate anyone else who shares their passion, and don't care what you drive in. It's the same with air shows. They just want to talk cars or planes for a while.

CW: So they're not very judgemental at all? I expected the opposite.

H: It's kind of cool. In fact, I should try to become more like these people & be less judgemental.

CW: What about dog shows and Star Trek conventions?

H: You're right. It'd never work. I might have a Charles Manson moment.

CW: Charles Manson had a harem of women who did anything he wanted. Wouldn't guys want that?

H: But they were all crazy.

CW: Sounds like a small price to pay.

H: Ok. Imagine this: You're a guy. You have 3 girls who'll do anything you want them to do. Sounds good so far right?

CW: Real good.

H: Ok. Now imagine their names are Paris, Lindsey and Britney. Now imagine you have to spend every waking hour of every day listening to them.

CW: Wow! It's a wonder he didn't kill more people.

H: I'm not sure he actually did any killing, but I'm sure glad I'm not Charles Manson.

CW: And I'm glad I'm not Hellen Keller.

H: Don't wanna be deaf and blind?

CW: Don't wanna be mute. If I were, I'd have to write out all of my stupid conversations.

H: Good god! And someone would have to read them.

CW: Exactly. Besides, I wouldn't be able to see the cars.

H: Enough already.

CW: I'm glad we stopped. Car shows are pretty cool.

H: Yeah. I think so too.

Oriental - is it a racist term?

I was listening to a humor podcast, where they were telling a story about someone who said "we liked the oriental guy better." The podcaster thought the use of "oriental" was racist: "they are called Asian now."

That got me wondering, so I asked J-hole about this last saturday night, and he said he thought it could not be racist per se because it is a geographical term. I basically agree that while its a term that has fallen out of favor, I can't see it as racist.

More thinking brought up these points:

Asian covers all of Asia including India, Iran, etc., while Oriental is more specified.

Note that Chinese people aren't afraid to use the words "Dong Fang Ren" which I would say is the proper translation of Oriental, no?

White people are called Caucasian and that is also a geographic term. (Are you callin' me a Chechen?) But I've never been called an Occidental.

The Oriental is a hotel chain in Asia. If it was a racist term, I don't think they'd use it.

Then again, racist terms in the USA are a bit different as they are sort of self-defined, and I would not call someone an Oriental..."Charlie, yeah, he's that tall Oriental guy." (Then again I wouldn't call anyone Caucasian either cuz it sounds dumb except when cops use it.)

Wikipedia sheds some light, and apparently you shouldn't use it as a noun for someone anymore.

So "the oriental guy" is better than "the oriental" which sounds right to me as I would rather be the Caucasian guy than the Caucasian.

p.s. the Wikipedia section on White Male is interesting as well.

News from the Chung

Rumor has it Costco Taichung is now open and issuing cards. Here's a a photo of it during the contstruction phase (BigEl steel at work?).

http://www.seattlestructural.com/international.costco.htm


Where are our beat reporters? For years they've been talking about it, and now that it has arrived, all they can post about are sixty year old musicals? Nihowdy may go queer (musicals?), it may go boring (airports?), but please don't let it go commie (costco = capitalist excess at its finest therefore we are above writing about it). That's just a bit too much for me; let's leave the Reds to the Chaon side of the blogosphere, I need J-Hole telling me how he can buy eight snow cones, a lawn mower and get a haircut on demand.

Bad News for Steven Seagall

From Xinhua - All the reincarnations of living Buddhas of Tibetan Buddhism must get government approval, otherwise they are "illegal or invalid," China's State Administration for Religious Affairs (SARA) said in Beijing Friday. (Xinhua report , Times report)

Northern Command, Musical Minutes

J-Hole is back in town for those of you who missed him. I met him briefly with D-Wayne at Northern Command Wed. night. He's bearded, more salt then pepper, (sorry, no pics) and has an outdoors-y feel about him. We talked mostly about fantasy sports, myself and D about baseball, which excluded John, D and John about football, which excluded me. Damn, D-Wayne is so fucking versatile. Anyway, then, suddenly the conversation took an unexpected turn.

D: Yeah, I like Ottawa, there's lots to do there. Beautiful city. Good shows.

J: Shows? You mean, like, concerts?

D: No, like musicals and stuff. I've seen a bunch.

R: Really! I saw Steve Earle in Ottawa. He was THIS BIG!

J: What have you seen?

D: I saw Grease...

(John nods his approval)

D: ...and some other famous ones, Phantom of the Opera, you know.

J: Okay, but what's the best musical of all time?

D: Grease.

J: No.

R: Are you asking Dwayne's opinion?

J: Yes.

D: I just gave it you. Grease!

J: No, that's number two! (he makes the vee sign)

R: Guys and Dolls!

J: No! (looks at me contemptuously)

D: Miss Saigon!

J: No! (spins cap on finger, rolls eyes)

R: Sound of Music!

D: Cats!

R: Riverdance!

J: NO! NO! NO! (looks exasperated and incredulous)

R: I know, Paint Your Wagon!

J: (big smile, points a crooked finger at me) YES! that's right man!

R: I knew it! We've had this conversation before.

D: But that's your opinion, not mine.

J: NO! Paint Your Wagon is number one, Grease is number two!

D: I only know Paint Your Wagon from the Simpsons.

R: Me too! "Here comes Lee Marvin, he's always drunk and violent!"

D: Just like John! No wonder you like it so much.

J: Greatest musical ever, man. Glad yall got it right.

R: Do you have a copy of the soundtrack?

(WARNING: some readers may have heard this part of the story before)

J: When I lived with Tom and Will, I had that cassette, and those fuckers they stole it! Or it disappeared, I don't know but it always seemed to me to be very suspicious. I mean, I listened to it every day!

D: Gee, no wonder it disappeared.

R: Have you ever replaced it?

J: NO!

D: God, you're stubborn.

J: NO!

Malcolm in the middle - of Africa

Taichung resident, South African native and friend, Malcolm Scheiber, has a new addition to his travel blog. This time he visits Botswana, Zambia, Malawi, Tanzania, Uganda, Kenya and Zanzibar. While only his second post, he makes up for it with a quality, detailed account. He also had several bound versions created for his Internet-challenged friends and family which included a Hong Kong trip he did not feel was good enough to post. Maybe some of your courteous comments can help him change his mind.

The SUV

People in America used to save their knee-jerk reactions primarily for politics. These days, there are few topics left that people won’t go off on rants about. One great example is the SUV. Pick-up trucks and SUVs now account for half the autos on the road…at least in Colorado anyway. I don’t know what started the fad or why people would spend so much of their monthly income for a vehicle they don’t really need, but it is what it is. In my opinion, if you’re going to spend $40K on a vehicle, it ought not to be made in Detroit. BMW and Audi make far superior products and have cars that handle in snow and are much more fun to drive. Most of the SUV rants come from the left, and while I don’t completely disagree with some of their assertions, I think they’re going about it the wrong way. It’s perfectly legal to drive a car that gets 3MPG and in my opinion, people should be free to spend their money on any vehicle they want, unless it adversely affects others in a serious way...and there is where the lefties miss the boat.

Anyone who had a driver’s license before 1990 can remember this scenario: You’re driving on a busy freeway and somebody eight cars in front of you jams on their brakes. You instinctively hit your brakes to avoid hitting the car in front of you. Why is this possible? Because you can see the eight cars in front of you through the front and rear windows. Flash forward to today: You’re boned and so is your car. You can try leaving 6-8 car lengths between you and the nearest car, but that means 2 cars will quickly jump in and odds are that one of them is a SUV. Parking lots are worse. Try leaving your spot when a Chevy Tahoe and an F-350 have parked next to you. With $5 a gallon gas on the horizon, SUVs will soon rapidly decrease in number. It’ll take a lot of stress out of the daily commute and fewer people will die over a stupid fad (and great marketing coup). If the left had simply played the safety card instead of the environment card, it could have happened much sooner.

Perhaps Detroit would then introduce a diamond plated sub-compact that runs on the tears of sweatshop babies. Conservatives would be delighted because liberals would be furious. Red A could be ahead of the curve on importing sweatshop baby tears, and could finally hit it big. He’d probably return home, buy a vintage Lincoln Navigator and modify it to run on the tears.

Goings On

A couple Sundays ago, Team Canada, aka The Pineapple Gang, took on the world (or at least some Taiwanese) in Human Foosball at DongHai University. Took some people by surprise to find most of the team camped in the field inside the track the night before. We now know how to say "damn foreigners" in chinese, so wasn't for naught. It was a valiant effort, but we fell short in our quest for domination to some punk kids who don't drink or smoke. The sun, booze, nicotine and THC conspired against our local heroes, but we still managed to finish 5th out of 25 teams. Man, it was HOT!

Last week, I took my first vacation in a looong time, visiting Kenting with the family. Not sure July is the best time to do that, but was a good time. Mostly sat on the beach, drinking beer and enjoying the scenery. Took Trey to the aquarium, so he could see some sharks and "so so so many fish!"

Angie's birthday party was on the 21st. That girl likes the booze!

And, of course, HOWIGATI

Cars

It's my first post, so hopefully all goes well. Will have to learn the ropes on attachments, links & such.

Well it's been a year back now & I've gotten a taste of life in North America. There are few things more important to many American's self-image than their car, so I thought I'd write about a few. Personally, I drive a later model GM because I got a great deal on it & it's practical. I don't really care too much about my car as long as it's comfortable, reliable & I don't have to make payments on it. I remember seeing a picture of Kevlar in an old pick-up & thinking that was perfect for him. I tried thinking about other cars that would fit other people & came up dry. I could kinda see Karl in a Geo Metro, but he's on another blog. Would P.I.M.P. drive a Cadillac? I doubt it.

Which blogger would look best behind the wheel of this American classic?