Sunday, February 01, 2009

Vouchers - How have you spent your vouchers or how do you plan to do so? Comments, please.

I have yet to pick mine up but have a couple of ideas.

  • Freeze-out poker with vouchers
  • A cash trade with any ARC holder who didn't qualify and wants the excitement of stimulating Taiwan
  • Buy gift certificates without an expiration date (can you do this?)

Karate Kid remake - D-Wayne and I have been discussing the remake with Will Smith's son, Jaden, as the Kid. Jackie Chan is said to be the favorite for the Mr. Miyagi role. This would mean shifting the Japanese story arc to a Chinese one ( patriot Chan would never play a villain or a Japanese - the same in many Chinese eyes).

Problems, problems, problems have I with this. First, acting ability. Pat Morita could bring it all: The Hip Nip stand-up comic, Ah Chew on Sandford and Son, Arnold on Happy Days, Ohara on Ohara and of course, the Colgate Wisdom Tooth. Jackie Chan's acting ability is best described with a little help from The Blues Brothers:

Casting director: So, Mr. Chan, which acting methodology do you subscribe to?

Jackie Chan: Oh, I do both kinds. David and Caruso.

Secondly is drunkenness. When Morita's Miyagi was drunk, he was like one of your friends whom you feigned listening to while directing him to his bed or a park bench and your worries were over. Chan's drunken martial artist is more like the grinning village idiot hopped up on Gao Liang, prompting Moms to cover their children's' eyes and walk them quickly away the twirling bowl-cut drooling guy.

Age and physique. Chan's too young and he too fit looking. He would need to go on the Dennis Quaid Doc Holliday anti-fitness regime to have any hope of pulling it off. Pat Morita was short, 5'3", (5 inches shorter than Chan) and not intimidating. If it had to be a Chinese actor, then I would suggest 元華 / Wan Hua, the landlord in Kung Fu Hustle. He's got the physique, the age (59) and the martial arts skills (part of the 7 Little Fortunes ). Better yet, if no suitable Japanese actor is found, have him play Japanese. He's done it before. In Fists of Fury, he plays a Japanese guy who makes Bruce Lee crawl on the floor like a dog.

If Mako were alive, he would be a no-brainer for Miyagi. However, he is not. So, suggestions please, along with explanations supporting your choice.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

J-Hole,

I need to talk to you. What's the best time to call your house?

Red A