Type in your home address, City, State and see what's going on.
Update: Oh, yes, you need to click "Satellite" on the right hand side or you just get street maps.
Hmmmm, could I get Mom to write HELLO in big white letters for the next pass?
I've seen this guy perform at each of the last three Spring Screams. If you ever hear about him playing anywhere you should definitely check him out. Along with older tunes like "Ain't No Hippy" and "Rockin' In The R.O.C.", he came out this year with some new gems, "Women Are Just Like People" and "The Islamic Fundamentalist Blues". ("...let's take the mental out of fundamentalist...") Raunchy and funny lyrics abound. Easily offended feminists be warned, approach his shows with an open mind... Thanks Charlie, wherever you are...
Last night I happened by Salut for an evening of music, pizza and lesbians. This in and of itself is nothing spectacular, certainly not blogworthy. However, I ran into BigEll and we were having a little chat with Dean and Frenchie when Frenchie congratulated him on his recent confirmation (as detailed in this blog around Easter time). The exact exchange went something like this.
Frenchie: I just want to congratulate you on your big news.
Elliot (expectant father): Thanks man, we're looking forward to it.
Frenchie: I'm not really a religious guy, but whatever floats your boat
Elliot (stoned?): It should be fun
Brett: Frenchie, this isn't the Elliot that got confirmed
Frenchie: Really?
Dean: I thought you got confirmed
Elliot (finally clueing in): No man, that wasn't me, that was some other guy
Brett: That was skinny Elliot
Elliot (laughing): I got confirmed when I was eight
Frenchie: So you are a Catholic. I knew it.
Dean: Who becomes Catholic in this day and age?
Ellio (confused again): I didn't convert!
Frenchie: I went to your website, why do you have a list of your favorite popes?
Note to all seven readers: Elliot Bougis (whom most of you have never met) is a recent convert, not the sports loving BigEll. Elliot's Blog does have a list of favorite popes, whereas BigEll's blog has write-ups on the latest in hip hop and frequently discusses pot usage. They are not the same person.
Penghu xiansheng or xiaojie?
Penghu was beautiful. I've never been there, but the version of it in my dream was great, minus one thing. The streets had been replaced with Venice-style canals without the filth. Major thoroughfares were wide and clear. Broad, flat-bottomed Chinese junks floated on a small layer of water. Much like an air hockey table but with water. Smaller streets and lanes consisted of Six Flags-like flume rides. Cruising around Penghu, my flume took me to a bar - PJ's Penghu. PJ finally achieved his dream of expanding his empire. Efficient service, clean guest rooms, an activities director and even a travel agency. And then there was the staff. Twelve ambitious,polite and knowledgeable people all waiting on us, but especially their leader, PJ, like Siegfrieds to their Roy. And, they were all male.
Well, the Oracle has spoken. I have listened. Dressed in his Terrell Owens jersey, the greatest prophet of our generation laid out the immediate future for all of us one Tuesday morning over Bloody Marys and the NCAA Championship Game. With the gift of the internet, we can now share some of those projections:
Projection #1: If Michael Jackson is found guilty, he will commit suicide immediately
Projection #2: South Korea will shun the Americans and align themselves with the Chinese in the next five to ten years.
Projection #3: And finally, the NT Dollar will continue to strengthen against the US Dollar, all the way to 23 to 1 (currently at 31.66)
Now you may or may not be willing to wager on these projections, but let it be known that this is not some case of a simple man running his trap. These nuggets of information are not laid out as mere probability. These are certifiable events already destined to happen. My friends, the future cannot be changed, so buy your last copy of Thriller, convert your South Korean Won to NT, and prepare for Chinese terrorists on Formosa.
On another note, I project that if a certain Texan's bar tab exceeds a certain Frenchie's bar tab for another month, a certain Texan's wife might confiscate the ATM card from his wallet.
Brett's doo
Originally uploaded by ryeguy.
His father told him to get a haircut. He insists that "IT" has been de-loused. He combs "IT" or does "IT" groom itself? If only "IT" could talk. I imagine it would say "wash ME wash ME!" Should the thing on his head pay rent 'cause it takes up more space than I did. He is itchin' to be unemployable. I heard he is going to work in the forest and this will make a great nest for the birds.
Breaking News! Apparently, the riot police were called in out of the goodness of the Party's heart:
The story also said that officials decided to break up the protests on Sunday because they were worried that "the coming of cold air and dramatic temperature drops threatened the health of feeble old women."
From Zhongwen.com, the link discusses people getting tatoos of Chinese characters...looks promising.
Let's start with a snippet I breezed upon over at Instapundit.Of course, for really bad product-naming, you've got to hand it to the Moro Islamic Liberation Front, whose initials produce a lot of, um, non-Islamic hits on Google.
The new link on the right comes from zhongwen.com. They provide a sidebar with a changing character every few minutes. Clicking on the graphic takes you to their homepage. A good site for searching, especially if you got a little Chinese character capability. You can search by English, radical, the Mandarin phonetic system (bo po mo fo) and commie pinyin.
Hear Ye! Hear Ye! Please remember that The Right Olde All Sports Hootenanny will be held on April 24. Again, there will be teams from football, rugby, soccer and the Society for Creative Anachronism. The sports will be, well, football, rugby, soccer and jousting. Time and place: Noon at Lin Dong College. If you would like to participate and/or practice CPR, please bug Lance for details. Well, no, make that Jack. Oh, hell, I don't know. Play it safe and bug both of them.
I bought sea salt. Now, hold it right there. I know this sounds sorta like saying I enjoy a deep-cleaning kelp facial mask, but it's not. I was given a tall boy-sized bottle the other day. It's French, so it cost $360NT. After Sunday's football, I was sore and remarked about a hot soak. Well, Jerry ( I-can-too-ride-a-motorcycle-after-two-pints-of-whiskey-and-beer-chaser Jerry) suggested some sea salt. Well, hell. Isn't all salt from the sea? Oops! Excuse me. Or from dried up salt lakes? Is the sea salt fresher? Or does the salt lake salt(?) have more time to intensify its flavor? Who knows? Who cares? We'll if you have a wife, she damn well will. Epicurious has a good description of the different kinds of salt here. Wait! Don't run away! It contains a link to borscht, for cryin' out loud! There's more! Over here, you can learn about the 84 different minerals in sea salt and order a 150 page guidebook to Colima, Mexico and its museum. By now you're in a salt buying frenzy. Rush on over to Mitsukoshi's basement supermarket and you can buy coarse grained sea salt for $30NT and fine grained for $60NT. Again, I have no idea what the difference is (yeah, I know, size), but the wife did find that only the fine grained salt said anything about okay for consumption and the coarse grained was for soaking.
It's upon us again. Last night a blood-fattened mosquto lazily flew about my ears at 1:30 a.m. She was slowed down with engorging, but still, I couldn't swat her from the bed. I was going to get up, turn on the lights, and in the process wake up the Crying Poopmachine, when I heard an amazingly loud SNAP, CRACKLE, POP as the bug-zapper took that bitch out. I never heard it kill so loudly - man it was sweet satisfaction. And the Crying Poopmachine (protected in her mosquito net) didn't even fuss.
CHICO GRAD
Originally uploaded by ryeguy.
With all this talk about Chico State, I thought everyone might like to see what an alumnus from said school looks like. I'm not sure about his past film history but I know he did his school proud in the beer drinking category last weekend at Spring Scream in Kending.
Chico may be a party school, but in comparisonTexas Tech is a paragon of scholarly virtue.
Scene Two: Calli, the blonde lead of several in the Shane World series releases, had a scene with a guy names Tex, a graduate student from Texas Tech, that won a contest online. I liked how they spent some time telling about themselves and the format allowed for a take off on one of those date shows, where we even get to see them go on a date. I suppose I’d like the ability to skip this part in the future (many fans would appreciate chapter stops to skip right to the sex), but it was similar to the Behind the Scenes footage a lot of DVD porn fans enjoy. It showed them kissing in several places and then finally getting down to business on a bed...At Texas Tech, it's not low brow frat boy shenanigans, but GRAD STUDENTS who at least take the lady on a date before making their porn movie.
We'll be having a guest blogger for a bit. As per our agreement (excluding Rye Guy), all appelations are given by others in Taiwan. Therefore, we need a little help with "Dug's" new handle. Hint: He lives really, really near Ground Zero PJ's and favors footware by Brunswick. Suggestions so far are: Wang Burger, Dog Wang, Burgermeister and Shaggy McBurger, Esquire. Other suggestions are more than welcome.
Well-intentioned college student cuts down eight branches from eight different trees. $4,000 plus.
National security advisor steals and shreds classified documents. $10,000.
PJ says " floating aircraft carriers." Priceless.
Well, it seems I owe an apology to an old friend. Back in my Changhua days, I met a guy from California and we turned out to be good friends. Me being from Texas and him from The Land that God Forgot, we naturally had a little rivalry. So, you could have understood me when I was more than a bit skeptical about some of his claims. One of them centered on his alma mater, Chico State University. They won the first, I think, Top Party School from Playboy. He also insisted that businesses loved them because they could "party a lot and still graduate and stuff." That, was what got under my skin.
Recent events have proven me wrong. Despite two recent tragedies, please see " Another blow to Chico State's image", these Wildcats have stiffened up and not allowed the past to stain them. So when some corporate headhunters from Shane's World ( an art-house production company, I think) came to town offering some real-life, hands-on experience, the Wildcats bit. They did not wallow in remorse or fall prey to feelings of guilt. Rather, the excited aspirants went head-to-head for a chance to fill one of the coveted slots. The Wildcats immediately assumed multiple positions with the company. Displaying their business acumen, the Wildcats lucky enough to be selected forewent payment on the hopes of making it big. Booze, blood, sweat, and yes, even a few tears, are the heroes in this story. For, in the end, they came out on top. They have proven themselves. Never again will they succumb.
